The business of people pleasing

4th of July weekend was a nice time with good people. I spent today working around the house. Mainly figuring out how to make my yard look a little less white trash. Mirrors, picture frames, and other wall decor items were hung with not that many holes this time. I did all of the hard work today with the help of the fam and some pretty sweet ladies.

Side note: I'm having another one of those good, good talks. Main topic: people pleasing. I have this BFF, E., who quite possibly could be a poster child for people pleasers. Once upon a time, I think I also could have fallen into this category. Not to get too deep b/c I don't consider my blog to be a forum for life lessons but here it goes: Over the past 6 months I have made a conscious effort to NOT be this way. Before this dramatic change I did anything to make sure people were happy with me (including make myself unhappy.) Friends, family, co-workers, pretty much anyone (excluding students) is included in what was my strong desire to make people happy. When I say "make people happy" I mean mostly emotional things. And nothing serious just small things that eventually add up. In most cases, this is completely okay, but this is also an excellent way to allow yourself to be taken advantage of. When it's close, best friends/people who sincerely care about you, it's totally okay to want to please them in normal, non-creepy ways. But then there are people who are not those things and it becomes just a cluster mess of a friendship/ relationship. No longer a fan of those. Not one bit. I now find myself in a place where I realize that those people who genuinely care, love, and appreciate me for the person I am. Those people don't need me to actually do anything to please them. They're friends or whatever with me because of who I am and that's just dandy. It's enough. Nothing expected and full understanding. I'm definitely a work in progress going on 25 years now, but you learn something new everyday I guess.